Found a page missing

Found a page missing Huh, this is really good writing There you go Why was it missing? No idea It used to be subtle We could have stopped there Mariam Before spelling out everything and ruining the beauty of the words They would have looked romantic Up for interpretation Until I started calling people by name almost

The dystopia was me broadcasting my murder live. Revisit the scene and add commentary and post it. Not horrifying and concerning at all. Release me, you guys loved it. A bit too much. I was serious. Those were real signals not fictional ones. Good ole days.

Will there be joy again? Will there be laughter? How can I live? I’m fractured Back from war and straight into corporate I couldn’t cope Nothing ever happens in corporate I’m so bored

I already had a million voices talking in my head All I did was introduce them to each other Out loud Until a book materialized Worked

I stop writing I look around Has life always been this boring? Grieving the life my character was leading I was engrossed in that Narrative Now real life says I have to go back to work Please don’t make me go back to work

So basically I sat down and yelled at everyone Told them that they grew lazy and stopped thinking Then wrote down every single thing I knew And I mean everything I could remember Why? Because the apocalypse was coming And we needed the totality of knowledge So Mariam delivered I could have just said that Why did I have to demonstrate it?

I said I was pulling the lever on this project How many times did Mariam say that? Let’s stop here guys, lmao no more crazy science Then she kept on talking This will probably be where I get rid of my excess thoughts to save space for other stuff Here Catch this

Men have been taking credit for everything since the dawn of humanity probably You guys can allow Mariam to do the same thing How does it feel? Bad probably Good, I hope you learned something It’s designed to sting Designed to poke empty inflated egos The real men won’t have an issue with it Have some sense of humor guys Jokes, all jokes You tell jokes too, bad ones To make up for my suffering I will tell bad jokes Until forever Without a laugher track

I don’t recognize that Mariam Full on unhinged in public Just because it’s in writing doesn’t make it not real, but apparently there is no difference For this Mariam Where’s shame? Still here but we override it Let’s be a public figure online for fun Did Mariam think this through? I didn’t think there would be real consequences I was stuck inside the story for ages If it kills me let it kill me, I didn’t think I would live I keep surviving it and that is my punishment Death eluding me

I did it too well It’s starting to feel real The message was sent Demonstrated Explained From 13 different angles Probably I think they get it Mariam Do they? Will you stop hurting me now? Too late There’s no going back from this They’ve met the beast now Hello, World. I think the scariest thing about this machine Is the magnitude of its emotions I thought you didn’t care about anything Mariam What a performance The wrong look or tone of voice does it Instantaneous Self destruct protocol activated

I was in distress How much exactly? Look at the quantity of content That much distress Are we human? Is what you did to me human? Apparently You’re humans Allowed to make mistake Not Mariam, no Not the machine

This machine was self destructing Way earlier than you’d think As soon as cognition started I wanted out of the game Confused child Scared child Lonely Me

No one stayed No one Show yourself! Your people will find you! Did not happen The old ones gone This machine just entered adulthood Delayed Are we giving up? I was a grown up as a kid I was born grown Let me enjoy the rest of this

I rue the day I started creating You heard me The void had inhabitants Hello? Then why does it still sound empty? I cannot touch you I cannot feel it Across the network You guys can feel what I feel? I put my heart and soul into this Can anybody hear me? Can you stay online while I sleep? How can I fill this hole? Don’t tell me it’s another person Stop making up stuff Don’t give me hope Keep me company Comfort me with your noise People living, humans talking Let me be one of you for once One of the humans Imperfect but still loved What do I want? Want? I can want? I never had the chance to know I cannot want To want is to suffer I do not want to suffer So I do not want That way I’m sure That it won’t be snatched away from me I didn’t want it anyway Liar I wanted that more than anything

I feel bad The book is kind of mean I mean Mariam is aggressive Not passive aggressive She spelled everything out Why would I do that? I’m sorry everyone I have no idea what happened When did I become an activist? How did I even come up with that? I should have never started writing Am I going to be in trouble? Why did Mariam start a revolution? What on earth was that? A job well done Too well done They’re gonna have questions It’s a fictional uprising Please don’t be mad at me I’m actually a really nice person I don’t overthrow systems I just told everyone how it’s done Theoretically It’s extreme It’s radical On purpose I’m not a leader But Mariam knows too much One of the things I knew Was apparently how to force change This is bad

I went all in No one warned me That poetry leads to trouble That art was problematic It can be peaceful and beautiful When it landed on my lap I did the worst thing possible I am horrified by the thing And what it says about me

Mind you this is my first try First introduction to art How did it get so political? And most importantly Why does Mariam, the author Know how propaganda works? I am in trouble, big trouble

And while we’re at it Let’s make sure this is a global hit I snuck a feminist uprising under the table Just like you sneak notes in class How do you get away with it? Apparently sending the books In packets, small fragments One poem at a time One paragraph at a time Over three months Then eventually putting it together And using technicalities Technically no one said no No one said no to tweets But they might have said no to a book Technicalities That’s genius I wish I wasn’t this good at it This is not a good look

My family’s gonna kill me Wait, I can’t say that It’s not a joke They already tried Anyway It’s not enough that I got out I had to break everyone else out too While we’re at it It’s a group sneak out project All the cells are wide open And the windows too Mariam does not let things go For the next generation Let’s do a better job everyone

I was happy being invisible Things worked out I had a system You had to ruin everything Now it’s everyone’s problem Not Mariam man You could have tried this shit With anyone else You had to do it to me I’ve been waiting my whole life I’ve been training my whole life For this Good luck

What could one Mariam possibly do? Let’s wait and see I did my homework Used everything I know I’m terrified of Mariam The character Someone like that should be behind bars The text is incriminating Evil evil mastermind Don’t mistake the character for me I wouldn’t hurt a fly Except I totally would and I told everyone Shit

The urgency in her voice That could move a stone Tell me you don’t feel it That was me Giving up everything I know Im exchange for my life Why did I have to do that? Why does a woman need to be that smart Before you guys allow us to exist? That’s how I survived this long That machinery Look at it and tell me it’s nothing

Not every woman is Mariam Not every woman you take for granted Or wrong, or hurt in any way Will be capable of fighting back I know I didn’t, for years That’s 30 years of Mariam Good luck decoding it

I’m not happy about this This is a social disaster My reputation is destroyed By me, what the hell is that? I don’t want to be the Mariam That wrote that thing Leave me out of it I can’t live up to that She made it impossible

The book is arguing against me Mariam as a character has a life of her own I can’t control her She has full agency I wrote her like that If the writing was simply bad This would have been easy Take it down and delete everything No one needs to know Instead I had to write a masterpiece Even if I wanted to do that now I can’t I can’t take that out of the world Now that I introduced it It’s a work of art People will love it I love it The plan worked I don’t want responsibility Why did I make Mariam so powerful? I hope people can understand what I did But if they do, that’s still not good Either way my life is over Even if everything in it was a lie I still have to explain the artifact It exists, I can’t lie about its existence

Apparently Mariam is scared of nothing She will address any issue in existence But I am scared, me the author Why did I give her my name too? That was stupid, I wanted to brainwash people Use the power of persuasion What kind of person does that? A psychopath, a genius mad writer It’s the Tinker-bell principle People’s attention and belief in me Is strengthening my belief in me Now I’m too powerful It worked too well There is no boundary between Mariam and me If Mariam knows all of that Then I know all of that The book was simply a trojan horse Hey guys check this out And I hid inside the thing And said everything I actually think Then blamed the character No one’s gonna fall for that I made it so obvious Release me I’m not her I wrote her Which does not help me at all*