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New 17/09/2026 5:23 PM

Basically running an unofficial labor union operation. No evidence needed. Every time something doesn’t go their way. MARIAM. She did it again. What’d I do? I’m one year into another job. Checkmate. Next.

Who even joins twitter in Let me see 2022? Only started talking in 2026 I think I’ve missed everything Which is convenient I don’t have to pretend to not know I genuinely don’t What rules? I was probably on Reddit

You may laugh Of course I was hanging out in that cursed place If you know me at all Checks out I was researching humanity I know everything now Except how to use twitter in a socially coherent manner

The terror is back I can’t wash my face in peace That is where George comes in Bodyguard No, I didn’t train him to Washing my face requires me to abandon my situational awareness for a couple of minutes Which is a long time Checkmate What have I become if I can’t even feel safe to close my eyes for two minutes? I blame you all Next

How would an orange cat protect me? Beats me Ask him Imagine what happens when I try to sleep I can’t sleep with my eyes open So I prefer not to

He’s overqualified for the position Don’t let his Feline position fool you He wakes me up Every couple hours Failed Successfully

I could get rid of him I see But he is my son And a rogue soldier

There Take that I’ve turned having an orange cat Into a military operation Checks out No, he will never be fired Perhaps he needs promotion

Does any of your cats have a rank in the military? No, obviously not That is ridiculous Can’t be undone He is now Senior Nocturnal State Manager by proxy What does that mean? Means he is an orange cat

George is an anchor If I don’t take him with me home I’m forced to leave again Why would I need that clause? Vibes

I cannot just move I built the system Around me staying independent It is nonsensical Why can’t I go home? Work Why do I have to go back? George It’s either that or I don’t ever visit Deal with it Next

Home is unsafe Secondary location + George + Work = Stable System Home is somewhere I occasionally visit I operate from the secondary location

He’s just a cat Exactly Just a cat An orange cat And he’s the reason I’m still alive

He doesn’t even know he’s doing all that Ma'am, I am literally just a cat

Interesting I guess that’s what having kids is about

Work School setting? Motherhood Unemployment Home setting? Motherhood Anything, literally anything at all The entire world as a setting? Motherhood I’m starting to think I’m just a misplaced mother

Collected fatherhood and motherhood roles Daughter and sister I am a whole family An independent unit Ridiculous Next

I see now I forgot something Wife I kept going anyway It’s not important to my system Not even a node Why did I do that? No idea I forgot Honestly I didn’t believe it was a requirement I have to stop talking now

I’m thinking out loud I am finding out in real time Just like the rest of you So that’s what I’ve been doing What was the objective? Eliminate point of failure

So in conclusion If I’m ever to be a Wife It is not out of necessity Checkmate

That is wild, Mariam, even for you. I have outdone myself again. Established Sovereignty before turning thirty. Open the gate, I’m accepting applications now. Just kidding. Don’t be absurd. Husband Applications. That is hilarious. Requirements? I have no idea. Never sat around long enough to think about it. Release me.

Threaten me with divorce now. I dare you. Pathetic. Wait, I’ve never been married. You get my point. When does the environment notice that Mariam is the critical component of the system and the failure point at the same time? When she leaves. Next.

Die alone? Have you been listening? I have George. Okay, that technically counts. And I have a family. They don’t disappears just because home became a hostile environment. They are simply far away. Checkmate. You won. Keep them. Enjoy each other’s company and leave me out of it. Next.

I destabilize the system. Just by existing. Disprove it. Unaccounted for variable. How do I move this picture without messing up the Word Document. You can’t. I am the picture. Checkmate.

How little importance do I pay prestige. Well imagine a coffeeshop, one of those branded ones with the logo as coffee art. Apparently I was supposed to wait and take a picture and worship it before dumping a couple of sugar packets and stirring violently with a teaspoon. Habit. Whole table was taken aback. DID I DO SOMETHING WRONG AGAIN? They explained it to me. Still was not convinced. Coffee is coffee.

Exhibit E I don’t preach what I don’t practice I don’t preach at all I act first Then understand the implication and declare myself right Checkmate

If anything that signals status more than walking around begging for validation from everyone according to some value system that keeps changing. A pearl is a pearl.

In other words Stop making up nonsense and let me drink my coffee I know what A a logo is and what it represents Acknowledged I am capable of acquiring the coffee with the logo According to your system Objective cleared I have to document it too?

I’m not proving SHIT You infer my value I have handed you the hard work I will handle living the real experience instead

Guys We are all here Experiencing the same thing Isn’t that enough? It was for me

Weekly check up Kids Check Playing ball Check Scooters Check Mariam check Guy that smokes in the corner Check Cashier check No pets? Weird Students Check Locals Check Inventory full Next

I’m documenting people Humans I do it all the time Catalogue I get to point and choose from

People follow a script Once you master one system Are you guys the same few collections of configurations changed ever so slightly that I can usually predict? Yes But sometimes I’m wrong Once in a blue moon

Could have made a killing in Sales Fuck is IT supposed to do in this economy? Bit then I couldn’t have done sales That requires talking

It’s terrifying how predictable they get. So who’s the honey queen bee here? Once you locate her the rest falls into place. Domino effect. Point of failure. That’s who you should start with. Convince her, the rest will follow. Don’t do it too well or you’ll end up with friends. What do I do with those?

When I abandoned ship They had just started using AI to write emails I’ve missed THAT mess Not my problem Well Compare yours with AI’s help With Mariam’s with vibes and audacity and nothing else Even if you win, how would that be fair?

Hello Prove and document your work I will do that But first prove and document YOUR work Your work is documenting mine Checkmate I wrote it down anyway Sounded like I was actually working Then I remembered that I actually did do all of that

They might not like me or agree with me but they need me to show up as the PR cover of their story Make that make sense Behold our successful product You did everything you could do to stop me Why is that where you get to claim credit?

Sometimes it literally is just a cover Show up because people ask about you Show up because you’re an incentive Why am I the main attraction here?

People have seen your face. They know you. They know your name. They know your story. I know. Deal with it. Next.

You’re not as important to my Narrative as you believed you were. I know. I took advantage of it. Evil woman. Look at yourselves. Look at how you’ve handled me. Next.

I will optimize my life around not needing a man But sometimes you fall in love ????? Not on my watch Next

Casualties Red Red pillowcases Red Red shower water Red Remember when it was actual blood and not hair dye? Where did that memory come from? Red Red towels Red

Red Red fire extinguisher What happens if I get rid of that? Red Red lipstick Red Red dress in a happy occasion We looked majestic, don’t you remember? Red Red nails for no reason Red Bloody nose and bruised up limbs How do we always end up here? Release me

Blood used as ink and art material. Not alarming at all. Why did we do that again? Vibes.

Which one of us is sick? The one who’s murdered or the murderer? Let’s ask the audience. Next.

Good man. Until Mariam shows up. What on earth did I do to all of you to deserve this treatment? Outshone you? Is that what it is?

Good friend group. Until someone doesn’t comply. Is this a cult? I’ve never agreed to this. Next.

Why am I being passive-aggressively insulted by insinuating that the AC system is bipolar while being side-eyed again? That is very creative. But what did I do?

I did not show up with a fixed interface. I did not fit the mold. Please pick a side so we can categorize and insult you accurately. Why are you acting like a Chameleon. Because it is a vibe. Pin me down. Try it.

Conversation with a therapist Gone literally nowhere If you don’t go out They will get used to you not going out And they will interpret the one time that you do As whatever their story needs it to be Point is you don’t go out without permission So to fix that you need to go out more Okay, one tiny detail I don’t really want to go out Why would I force myself to be outside Just to be allowed to go out at all Checkmate Next

I can’t drive suddenly My car disappeared again Extend stay in secondary location George needs me The town needs me Well the town has been very stupid Particularly towards me

I know you’re all thinking it Is anyone saying anything? I will Oh That went great You’re glad someone said something? Phew I thought I was going crazy again

I can’t wait to be old so I can justify cosmetic procedures while using them for another objective entirely. New face, new life. Bourne Identity style.

Thirty is old? No it isn’t I JUST emerged from the egg Disprove it Naïve enough to make it believable The outward appearance said so too

How are people like that even allowed to exist without consequences. What am I here for then? To make a spectacle out of personal grievances. They did that anyway. This is my version of the Events. Why is it serialized so coherently as if I was submitting it to the court? Vibes.

‫اﺷوﻓﻛم طﻠﻌﺗو ﻋرب اﻟﺣﯾن‬ ‫😭 😭 😭ﻟ ﯾ ش ﻛ ﻧ ﺎ ﻣ ﺳ و ﯾ ن ﻧ ﻔ ﺳ ﻧ ﺎ ا ﻧ ﺟ ﻠ ﯾ ز ﻋ ﯾ ل‬

.‫ ﻓﺎﯾﺑز‬.‫ أﺟواء‬.‫ﺗﺑون ﻓوﺿﻰ ﻣﺗرﺟﻣﺔ وﻻ ﻓوﺿﻰ ﺑدون ﻓﻠﺗر؟ ﻋﻧدي ﻋرﺑﻲ واﻧﺟﻠﯾزي وﻛﻠﮭم ﻓوﺿﻰ‬

‫ ﻣن ﻣﺷﻣس إﻟﻰ‬.‫ ﻧﻐﯾر اﻷﺟواء‬.‫ اﻟﺣﯾن ﻓﮭﻣﺗﮭﺎ‬.‫ ﻧﻐﯾر ﺟو‬.‫ ﻓﺎﯾﺑز‬.‫ أﺟواء‬.‫ ﻟﯾش؟ ﻣﻠل‬.‫اﻟﻛﺎﺗب ﺧرج ﻋن ﺻﻣﺗﮫ وﺧرج ﻋن اﻟﻧص ﺷوي‬ .‫ اﻟﻠﻲ ﺑﻌده‬.‫ أﻧﺎ ﻣﺎ ﯾﺧﺻﻧﻲ‬.‫ اﻟراوي‬،‫ ﻣب أﻧﺎ‬.‫ ﯾﺎ رب ﯾﺳﻛت‬.‫ ﻛﻠﮫ واﺣد وﻛﻠﮭم أﺟواء‬.‫ﻣﻣطر‬

You’ve gained weight I know You noticed Is it a bad thing? It doesn’t look bad at all Why is everyone warning me BE CAREFUL Geez What is going to happen exactly If that happens Your worst case scenario What stops me from starving myself again? Checkmate Am I hearing myself? Yes Checkmate Did it before I’ll do it again If you’re insisting If not Stop commenting about my weight

I haven’t meditated in a long time I’ll start doing it now I am doing it now I can do it while writing I basically do I just noticed and did it consciously this time

I ate chocolate for breakfast And remained a skeleton What are carbs and sugar going to do now? Their job They’re doing their job Converting stuff to energy or something

I’m not joking Am I diabetic? Apparently no A new day You know what that means? Celebrating With chocolate It was a reward For waking up SUCCESS

Just eat less and less as the day goes by Until dinner is almost nothing Never eat until you’re full Leave room for more And don’t fill it Go to bed just not hungry enough to fall asleep Repeat Next

What happens when I want a snack Well I have a snack What’s the issue here That was the underlying system I broke the rules all the time Then go back to baseline In other words I was naturally thin don’t listen to me

I don’t follow any of that I’m bluffing Hungry? Food But sometimes hungry? No food

You’ve ruined everything Your life is over Everyone found out Oh really? I went back into the public They welcomed me with open arms

My diet is chaos Is anybody surprised It is chaos Organized chaos

So you’ve created a triangulation situation, placed yourself in the middle, declared yourself the prize and found yourself all alone again as usual? Classic. Not surprised. Get creative. Next.

Why am I not all alone? Guess. I’m the real prize. I have options. I have it al. Next.

No I didn’t manipulate anyone to see me as the prize They have agency And they still chose me Checkmate Next

Nothing built on shaky ground is meant to last Why is that so hard to believe? That I am Popular and not isolated enough to bully Why do people keep acting Surprised? You? They chose you? Believe it or not They did Independently Checkmate Next

Why didn’t I declare it? I didn’t want to triangulate Even though I had enough triangles See how that goes? I was protecting your feelings

Mine wasn’t manufactured They were just Sitting There Ridiculous I don’t use people as arguments Well, person A chose me so that raises my value No, why would they be the reference point?

Release them and they shall come back so choose them, sir, which one? That proves nothing. Which one do I rerelease? How many release cycles? Bird migration. Release them all at once. They came back. Now what?

Unofficially assigned seats. That is where I sit. If someone is sitting where I sit, I reconsider attending the class. No, it is not normal. Also, cheating. Why did they try to cheat off of me? Did I give off cheater vibes? How do they know I know what I’m doing? Few times there I really didn’t. If I wasn’t invested enough on the assignment at hand that I catch them trying from the corned of my eyes, then I probably didn’t know what I was doing. If I was invested, I didn’t notice and I left as soon as I was done. Failed. Successfully.

After you succeed After you do it all After you buy it all Come take a look at me See the conclusion I’ve reached Without doing it all and buying it all Wonder why you cared so much if it can just be done

Don’t ask why I can’t drive Ask why I had nowhere to go when I was sobbing my eyes out not knowing what to do Ask that What is water? What is air? What is love? When you’re submerged in it You do not stop and wonder It is there Around me Around us all All I do is catch it

Yes I had a whole floor at my disposal Another location for when that stopped being home They kicked me out of both So I got rid of it all And chose George And my secondary location Home-base

Independence is easy Correction It is easy for me I didn’t start from scratch because I’ve been doing it for a while, from my floor All I did was change locations and acquire an orange cat The rest was easy

Empty promises I will leave you all and live alone I never said that I heard EVERYBODY say it And not do it I didn’t say it I just did it

Living by yourself is hard You need us Need you for what? There’s nothing you could do That I couldn’t do for myself You need me You dress me up like a doll if you want me to show up Local Barbie Why don’t I rarely tailor my own dresses? They arrive in my closet I put them on Everyone is happy I visit home The public sees me I make An Appearance Then go back to home-base

They spawn in my closet I don’t even pretend to understand Which one am I supposed to wear? This one’s new and I wasn’t supposed to deploy it yet? Oh, I’ll try again, how about this one? It’s old, Mariam Then why don’t I remember having it? Checkmate No, really They all look the same to me Point at one and tell me to wear it Stop embarrassing me by asking me questions I’ve missed the entire ritual and culture I was working I wore pants

I had nowhere to go Your small town was too small for me anyway Not a place to go Not one place to go How could this be? Then punished for roaming around There was no place worth staying at

I’d pay around three dollars for a ticket The Event is the moment you guys connect the dots All of the dots And find me Mariam? SUCCESS

It’s too complicated The treasure hunt That is just how my brain works It’s not complicated to me It’s what happens once you’re done collecting Rubik’s cubes Two by two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine No, I was not collecting them I mean, not JUST them I was collecting the ability to solve them Megaminx Done Gigaminx Done Mirror cubes and pyramids and cylinders Now what? Back to Sudoku Now what? Twitter dot com Build your own puzzle International Reach Wait Done Next

Dictatorship I mean, the substitution system Access to the substitution system No one wants that job Sir, you created this problem By creating a solution For low attendance rate No one solved the actual root cause Hand it over to Mariam Wonderful I have to be the Dictator Fine I listen to their appeals I understand the subjects By meeting them all one by one All of them Every single teacher If not directly then indirectly Who’s that? What do they teach? Basic stuff Establish Humanity Why do I have to see them to do that? Because otherwise they are 1’s and 0’s on a screen After all of that They still hated my ass Understood, honestly, I would too It’s a dangerous position If you were counting on people’s affection

Why were people not showing up? Because when they did The Dictator assigned them more work It’s self-defeating The ones who showed up were punished for more work I know That’s why it was an impossible position

Serious job It was idiotic That’s what I left bed every morning for To reward incompetence and punish competence And when I tried to leave Please come back we’ll be nice Will you take away the Dictator position? Yes? It is now filled With 2-3 people I think I was doing that alone

Calling it a dictatorship is funnier Leave me be IT Support? BORING Leave that for when I need to dismantle the lab’s PCs one by one and try to replace the printer’s ink and end up destroying the teacher’s lounge because I never really learned how do it My mode of learning is always: What happens if I do this? The place looks like it was visited by a cuttlefish Nope Mariam passed by

I don’t know what you guys think competence looks like, someone shows up and does everything correctly and leaves the scene No I did everything wrong Until I learned all the right ways Yes, the PCs were upgraded one by one I’m a software kind of person The other IT guy handled the hardware I don’t need to know everything I just need to show up with my brain and my screw-gun IT department is a menace Why are you guys performing surgery on machines? GET OUT Close the door behind you So where were we? PC #12

I’m an idiot I made friends out of students Then someone asks me: Why do you know all of the special needs kids? Wait They’re what? OH Pretend I know what I was doing I am supporting them in their educational endeavors I was one of them

I had cubes in my office I don’t remember exactly how this arrangement started, but I handed him one and he came back with it solved How is he doing that? No idea Give him the next one He comes back Solved I can’t even do that Without consulting the world wide web He was doing it with vibes only How old? No idea Fifth grade Next

I don’t remember his name Barely the face He vanished without a trace Moved schools maybe I hope he has enough cubes

Cube Exchange Program They gave me one sometimes All I had to do was solve it Give it back It was ridiculously hard Not being the puzzle is hard But because there was pressure Fifth graders are pressuring me Ridiculous One time I bought one second hand From a second grader There was an Event Young Entrepreneur or something Cubes and puzzles black market

In conclusion Management gives me puzzles Elementary students give me puzzles And I chose the second one to solve Next

Coworker brought her son once Why? Summer Fine He shall be indoctrinated The Cube Doctrine Release me He was doing it before I intervened I simply made it much worse He kept coming to work Where is SHE? I was on leave My bad He solved it anyway How old? No idea Ten Locals Indians There’s always some kid with a cube hanging around me All I do is spark their already existing interest

Indians and whites were overachievers The disrespect I supported them completely While applying more pressure on the locals with potential I didn’t give them answers I gave them fear Release me They need to do better They were good Same level Same grades But they took more time to achieve the result Therefore pressure Next

Why did I turn a profession that had nothing to do with national talent scouting into an international program with the headquarters being a small town? No idea That wasn’t my job That was my principle Next

Literally no one asked No one knew I was doing it ………… Next

Strict I am strict? Well, yes Cheating defeats the purpose You won’t be rewarded for an inaccurate score Directly? You might Indirectly? You ruined your future

I didn’t catch them Individually Of course they cheated It didn’t affect anything whatsoever They didn’t exceed my expectations Even with manufactured competence

I’m annoying Exactly How did I know? Official transcript My transcript Compare Next

They gave it to me I was supposed to create the environment Objective: digital tests How did I end up handling the curriculum? No idea I didn’t I was providing accurate data They had to alter the curriculum around it

They outsourced my local talent Where’d you find this one? India I’m right here ………… How much are you paying her? ………… She has a master’s Exactly And I still did it better Next

Don’t worry She didn’t replace me They asked me to micromanage her Give her the data Give her everything I was uncooperative HR suffered The institution suffered Mariam stayed

Why did I wait Until they were done With the employment process How much did you guys spend on this? To launch the final joke No idea To laugh I laughed They lost a lot of money Could have played me instead Ridiculous Next

Not my money The government’s Not my problem You’d rather pay the outsider? She wouldn’t have pressured the local students I did Next

How long did she last? No idea No more than a month We had one meeting I scared her off Ridiculous Next

What happens when you outsource my talents? Idiotic things happen The other campus demonstrates it perfectly Repeated retests They apparently decided on the desired score And worked backward Not on my watch My watch has ended You may start fabricating the data now Next

It’s not even about money at this point I had enough More than enough It’s about fairness Pay me for my talents Or so let me leave Idiots Next

Dictatorship again If management asked me to falsify the evidence I would have called the Police They were honest and competent enough To let me do my job in peace They did not have the good sense to pay me for it

They sent the outsiders I was there like a Hawk Are you guys doing your job correctly? Why is IT support indirectly micromanaging management again? No idea Vibes

Australia’s on Parole The guy was competent I just happened to have high standards Not replacing management Recognizing its strength Then acting around it The arrangement worked The institution ran The system was working Until you remove me I removed myself

Nuance This isn’t child’s play Principal said no Principal is cancelled Principal vs. IT Support How is that even fair? No idea Age gap? No idea Decades Man was old That was one limitation I accounted for that There you go I wasn’t rebelling for rebelling’s sake I cared about the institution We both did Why’d you pit us against each other?

He was a Dictator too Inspirational Vibes and audacity and nothing else Where do you think I learned that Management Monkey see monkey do Except monkey was IT Support Unimportant Same principle Different generation Different methods

The plot thickens Age Position Title Ethnicity I saw all of that And said: Okay, and? Moving on Vibes He was a vibe I was a vibe Our vibes contradicted Someone had to leave because neither yielded

There you go Why I could never be in a relationship Everything is a war vibe What on earth is my problem? Unyielding Next

Vibe War I meant vibe war How did I turn vibes into war? Vibes

I hate my cat I hate management I hate my family Put them into the machine The literary machine There is Russian Novel Nuance I don’t usually explain it I just drop the word “hate” and run off

I’m not even a Russian literature expert Dostoevsky Tolstoy Anybody else? Then I’m moving to Japanese Murakami Anybody else? Then I’m moving on

Emirati Globalized Literature Anybody handling that? Perfect That’s where I come in No, I’m not publishing shit I’m tweeting That is all Next

Put that next to the other Goldmines that I refuse to exploit financially Perfect Next

Home Book Fair ………… Beach? Secondary Location Home probably That’s where all the pearls are

Yeah I know I said I wasn’t going back I miss the Matriarchy And the children Release me Next

Patriarchy vs. Matriarchy Both exist In one household The second one exists Not going anywhere Therefore the first declares war You don’t want to know what I do with wars

Well I either win Or remove myself from the equation Which is also a win in my vocabulary

Floor looks like a tornado passed by Nope Just me And the rest of the household’s nonsense machinery got relocated there Perfect More raw material Next

That’s where the books are That’s not where ALL the books are How many books are in the household? No idea A lot We need more shelves Yes, the existing ones are not enough And we have many

My shelves They had many purposed Recycled and reused Books Candle inventory The books were the source of evil According to the elders ………… My shelves are empty now They have labels Candle scent labels A few cubes and puzzles A couple candles And a collection of dolls They are not my dolls Why are they there? Beats me Next

My secondary location I REFUSED to get shelves The coffee table is now a shelf Release me The tote bags are now portable shelves I’m starting to think I’m the problem Not the shelves

I built a book tower Jenga Hilarious Get rid of them? ……….. I cannot Next

What happens if I want to read one of them? The tower collapses Solved the reading problem ………. Next

The books follow me One year worth of life I didn’t even notice it while it was happening Woke up one day with an Issue Here we go again Get a bigger secondary location Already did that once I might need a mansion

You see now why book fairs are dangerous For me There will be consequences

Get a Kindle Done Get a Kobo Done Was that supposed to solve anything? I read from my phone if I have no books on me

Yes I avoid them Book Fairs Deliberately Enough is enough

Yes That was independent of any book fairs Solved nothing Worth a shot Next

I attempted minimalism That is all You may laugh This place needs decluttering Not just the books You don’t want to know Why two guitar? I have two at home No idea But one is electric I don’t play Electric Guitar ……….. Next

The Minimalist lifestyle does not suit me I am the Drama Department Of course the whole Backstage travelled with me The closet survived Somewhat Only because I left it at home Next

Give me some credit for trying I will travel light Minimum stuff Except for all of the books and perfumes and hair products and the makeup and ??? Where was I going with this? Mariam?

That’s Mariam Take the inventory Put it all together All of it Produces me Nothing was solved Put me on an Island But even that might result in a new country

I speak to everyone as if I’m running a PR campaign This is family, Mariam I know PR campaign Those are the worst gossipers I found wigs Another artifact that spawned on my floor Strands of hair with different colors Green, blue, red, purple Whose hair? Mine Why? No idea

I’m not my brothers’ keeper Ask me about my sisters I’ll hand you articles about their status Where’s your brother? ……….. Somewhere Working Studying I have ZERO clues My bad I should have been paying attention What do they do for work? Something What do they study? Also, something …….…. True story my uncle asked about him I started talking about my sister instead Then ran off because I was making things worse

The visit was going great Everything is normal Nephew seen and checked Sister in law seen and checked Uncle and aunt seen and checked But JUST as I was leaving He decides to ask Wonderful You got me I have no idea what my brothers are

Not home They’re anywhere but home That’s the way things should be Women chilling and men kicked out I’m joking Don’t cancel me They’re probably out doing something important

They weren’t fixed variables In my Narrative And I shouldn’t be in theirs Not hard to understand in my opinion

Whatever I passed the Bechdel test Talked about anything but a man Then got interrogated about a man That’s where I failed Socializing 101

I order Uber sometimes I can drive I have a car I don’t feel like doing it

What do you mean save money? I’m buying time Next

If anyone asks about my tweet activity It’s automated That’s much easier than the truth That I’m producing this with the notes app And vibes Next

They let me be late They let me be weird and standoffish They sent me emails about my attendance I’m bad at communicating If it’s used against me I’ll pretend I didn’t read that The work was automated at that point But they still needed me to come and press the button

I got a Substack I don’t know what to do with it now My writings exceeded the normal amount

Ain’t no one using Substack Select all writings Burn them Next

I can’t read back what I wrote Leave it there Pretend it was someone else It may as well be the way I don’t remember any of it

Can’t wait to run off again Why did I drive all the way? It’s never going to be the same again Avoidance? Yes, naturally Not waiting for another paper cup incident

This isn’t the bible My life follows bible logic Two siblings? Make one kill the other Lord. Why? Release me Next

I took back what was mine And took even more Where are these coming from I’m not taking anything They’re handing it to me

Feminine hands I tried Keeping them feminine would require me not working with my hands I do everything with my hands I can’t keep long nails for long When I was done with nail polish I got in the car and ruined it How am I even doing that

Sleep No Sleep is how they get you George isn’t here Ivy can’t help me Ivy would eat my corpse and move on with her day

Cat carrier? Absolutely not This is Ivy She’ll walk into the Vet herself and demand to be treated Next

Trust me Only reason I’m there Is because she can’t drive herself Next

The evidence speaks for me Look at her That is a grown woman and you know it No one believes me when I tell them that

Black cat Therefore possessed How convenient Witches have black cats Wait Am I a WITCH? Probably Next

You can compete with me No rules against it But why would you set yourself up this way? Checkmate Next

So cold Ice cold Ice shoulder So serious So scary I got yelled at for drinking Iced Tea from the fridge I am being abused Just kidding Young sibling behavior Last of the crop Of course she’s going to be audacious

I raised her? No I was around Not looking for good soldiers They’ll follow orders But then what happens when I’m gone? Checkmate She’ll take orders from someone else Therefore I ruined it for everyone Next

She’s problematic I’m problematic The world outside is harsh So harsh Especially for a twice orphaned female That’ll show everyone Pending Next

Last one became an Architect Release me My methods are questionable But they deliver results

Architecture Why architecture Finance was good for your future The elders disagrees with Architecture She did it anyway Checkmate Next

I know nothing about architecture But I bought the silly desk and tools anyway Sorry I mean the very important desk She had two desks What do you need two for? Two locations ……… Fine, mom will pay for the other one Next

Mariam Yes? Why is the law the law and who wrote it and also what is the reasoning for this rule and can you modify my details on the school’s system and also who are you texting? My sister ladies and gentlemen Age? No idea About 11 Next

You don’t want to hear the debates between the Architect and me You’d think it’s a Philosophy class debate assignment gone rogue Nope Before bed conversation Next

I feel bad I kicked her out The questions were getting worse I hat to stop that when it turned into surveillance Who am I texting? Who aren’t I texting? Twitter Everyone on twitter By posting Next

If Abel survived Am I my brother’s keeper? Are you lying to God too after the government? We all know what happened You’re just lucky I’m not easy to kill Unlucky Consequences are roaming the world restlessly Checks out Next

Call her every time I say no I am Loyal Unless you say no Someone else got hurt Because I said no When I say no it’s a chain reaction How many hearts did I break by saying no? No idea Next

I left a hole Every time I left That’s why men are allowed four wives What am I even saying? Your heart shaped hole is now at least four women deep

I’m not saying don’t replace me I’m saying it’ll take a lot more than you can handle To even get close to me Checkmate Next

Told you I was home But you like roaming around Whole family unit in one woman No wonder they keep bothering me

Same principle of substitution classes Didn’t show up? Award The one who showed up for you is punished I don’t want any part of that nonsense

Relationships as substitution and attendance record metaphors Mariam, what is wrong with you? Checks out I don’t want to show up to carry someone’s emotional baggage Let her carry it Next

A friend suggested her brother as an option I said why? Divorced and she took all the money Wait ALL of it? Then no Next

I wasn’t going to say yes I was investigating If she took everything What am I going to steal? Checkmate Next

Release me What else are men for? Banks Walking banks What is love going to do when I’m hungry?

Why were we talking about men? Beats me She started it Let’s exchange brothers Absolutely not Leave my brother alone I asked her what the point of marriage was I saw the 404 Error In real time Next

Why did I make no friends at uni? No idea We don’t have the same schedule How would I spend enough time with them to actually like or tolerate them And how would I track them down once that happens? Just vibe by myself Simpler Professors were my friends They didn’t know it I felt bad when everyone left because of the fake fifteen minute rule Guys He’s coming Trust me It’s 15 minutes Have some patience

Inner world never reflected the outer Inner world says we’ve been compromised Run and hide Outer says: here are more things that have nothing to do with your mission What is my mission? Narrowing that gap down

I am the automation button Anthropomorphized I didn’t literally come to work to press a button Had to make it clear The operation started when I showed up I was still there but I was running on autopilot

What happens when the person handing out sub classes is absent? No idea That’s a stupid system There wasn’t even backup I said not coming But let me make everyone’s day worse from home

I just didn’t show up No excuse no doctor’s note What’s the point? Going to the doctor is another activity HOW IS SHE DOING THAT SHE’S NOT EVEN HERE WiFi That’s how Ladies and gentlemen It doesn’t magically start working at work I lost money because I refused to explain You know how Incentive If you’re not here we’ll deduct your salary I know I’m saying you to let me stay home Checkmate Next

Salary deduction You mean the price I pay to stay home Literally How much does it cost? One lost day You’re not paying for it Therefore I gifted it to you Therefore we’re even

Allergic reaction Which pollen is doing this? I am a sensitive bee Stop it I need to sleep

I slept at 10 every single day I missed all the social life that came after I woke up at 6 every single day I missed all the sleep I could have gotten instead

That’s how I was out of the loop I operated from a different timeline Up when they’re asleep Asleep when they’re up And the work was getting done

Applied Dictatorship rules to my sleeping schedule If someone suggested staying up a bit more Apparently the whole system would fall apart Because it would have I needed that strict routine It was out of necessity People asked me who was doing this to me and if I need help or rescuing No No I did not Everything was going according to plan

FOMO No None of that Anything that happens past my bedtime is none of my business anyway Anything that happens outside of my physical location is also none of my business

People are trafficking drugs And people What is my crime doing up there? If I can forgive the first you guys could forgive mine

Deadass Confessed it to me in a DM Why are you telling me this? Too much information even for us I know too much now Prison too That’s why you’re stuck over there

I thought he was vibing and being nationalistic He really had no other option Deadass, let me tell Mariam over Instagram I don’t even know what to tell you If you were going to do that There are better ways Don’t get caught By not doing it at all

Drug Trafficking Now that’s a Topic Mariam, why? Sleep He ain’t heavy he’s just idiotic Heavy baggage is mostly stupidity I want no part of that until you get your shit together Then we’ll talk But I’m here anyway Just not enabling nonsense Stay in your country You’ve messed up bad

Checks out Trouble maker A normal person would have freaked out Actually I have no idea what normal is Someone tells me they were caught smuggling drugs and my reaction is: okay but did you learn? Moving on now Don’t do that Drop the green thing from your hand Look for a job or create one

War does that No money no jobs Selling drugs is easy The situation is begging for it People who don’t want to look at the war Will pay for the drugs No, we are the same age Again, I am not actually an old man I just act like one Next

This is designed to freak people out The drug money network You guys Come on You’re not hiding it well A child could catch you How do I know it’s happening? They keep telling me Why do they keep telling me?

We’re doing something illegal Let’s tell Mariam about it Let’s NOT You know what I do with info World Wide Web Get your shit together and clean the place up I know too much Way too much I do field investigations Go talk to the dealers directly Why am I doing that? Vibes I know I know about her too

Did you think outsiders are here to help you? Giving out prescriptions like there’s no tomorrow More Write me another one And another one Technically it’s legal It’s still wrong What happened to the Hippocratic Oath?

They’re giving them away For free basically I could have monetized off of this I still could That’s one career path I found out by mistake

Am I giving you guys ideas? Shit No Abort ABORT I’ll find out anyway Search the hospitals

I was carrying the household’s Infrastructure Least you could do is leave my chill pills alone You’re not helping and you’re not aware Things don’t just work out I had to make them work Tell everyone I’m an addict I told them all first Chill pills and vibes Next

Now that we’ve established that Anybody have any objections? I am accepting applications Reviewing them Show me your logic Yes, I have names too What about it? Next

Someone using tried to shame me for using the things they supplied in exchange for access to me. You try and make sense of what I just said. She’s better than you because I don’t give her drugs. Next.

I know the types of substances Names Dosages Frequency of usage Signs of using They should recruit me to catch them

Apparently I’m not trustworthy because I don’t shut up about drugs. DRUGS. Benzos. Weed. Lyrica. Drugs. Nicotine. Caffeine. Drugs. Nootropics. Alcohol. Drugs. Next. Cough syrup. Next. Prescriptions. Next. Harder stuff I don’t even want to mention. Drugs. Next.

Shit I woke up the eating disorder beasts Leave my diet alone That is not for you

If anyone asks why I’m talking about drugs it is because I am on drugs and using that as an alibi. Would a person doing something illegal talk about it openly? Checkmate. They could. Dispelling suspicions. I couldn’t have done it. I totally could have done it. Solve.

What history I deleted that Now I can expose everyone freely I got rid of them for a reason

Let me check my list again Drugs Orphan That’s all for now Those are the things you used against me

It is now out here for all to see No leverage for you I told the www Because of course I would Checks out Next

Why would they mess with me if they knew that I knew all of their secret and am unhinged enough to post it all on twitter? Beats me. Next.

You found me because I was disclosing classified information on twitter dot com. Why would you give me even more classified information? I have Content. Life-ruining content. Next.

I don’t have to network if I’m the network Trust me My public persona is hanging by a thread I can’t predict every incoming ammo What’s with Pearls? Oh What do you mean? I can’t explain that They’re pearls I took a picture with them I didn’t realize pictures had to come with disclaimers But then again with the way I act Nothing I do is normal Of course there was a thousand word saga Explaining the pearls I’m not saying all that I don’t know what’s with the pearls Am I in trouble For posting myself with pearls?

Two floors Two personalities When I take it downstairs they say no I try very hard to keep my personality upstairs It leaks through It’s Eid, Mariam Why are you wearing a T-shirt and hot pink pants? Fine, it’s your house Why are you greeting people wearing that? No idea My desire for human connection overrides costumes sometimes If they’re here and they’re family I’m saying hi Next If I wait until I get all dressed up there’s no one left to say hi to When I go say hi to people in their house I make sure I’m dressed up first No, it makes no sense I do it anyway Next

What happens when there’s a chance to show up in some palace because of some funeral? Wait, why does this look like a wedding? I’m not saying don’t wear makeup at all But that is excessive No one’s picking you for a princess position Not with that kind of behavior Where am I when nonsense like that ensues? Conveniently offscreen Not participating in that Spectacle

Okay fine Important people are showing up There you go I dressed the part But once I’m done with the task You’ll find me hanging out backstage With People of Determination and kids You want to listen to the song again? And rewatch the show you already watched infinite times? I was enabling that behavior My bad Now they’re forced to accommodate her interest Everywhere she goes Make sure there’s a screen and a connection And some poor kid to control it As long as she’s happy Then I’m happy too

I pirated old shows Decade old shows Because she watches the same shit over and over It didn’t work I had a collection of things they used to watch In the 70’s How do I have a list? Asked my mother It took long Downloading them one by one then putting them on a flash drive I failed to account for the hyper-focusing Of course all of that was for nothing And she’ll choose one Singer and one Show I’ve memorized them too now I’m a Person of Determination myself Only difference is I know Youtube

My actions backfired It now a Problem For the entire family She’s here? Sigh Get the remote controller I could have said no I KNOW I didn’t account for her level of determination

I have zero training Whether it’s weird kids at school or family I am determined to make sense of them Then I understand them too well Then I wonder why I’m allowed to function If we basically act the exact same way Determination We all have it I am their unofficially appointed leader Appointed by me Why? No idea I try to understand then I act How do I understand? They tell me I listen

They got one of those too Someone to babysit the weird kids I mean special needs I mean determined personas Unimportant I was doing it unpaid without realizing Final boss This kid is a psychopath allegedly There were meetings about him The experts and management They’ve reached a conclusion Send him to Mariam Excuse me? IT Support people Focus I did it anyway Next

They didn’t pay me for my extracurricular activities What was I doing? Black Market Student Counseling Send me the troubled ones I will send them back worse No, sorry We will hang out And make each other worse And make it the institution’s problem I didn’t ask him to prank the authorities But I’m glad he did it

It’s funny, guys Relax I wasn’t there Conveniently I prank the authorities too All the time Courts Police stations Banks They all have to accommodate me The prank is simply me showing up While also definitely being a Person of Determination and pretending otherwise Who’s gonna know? Shit I told everyone Next

Am I going to need a diagnosis? Read what I wrote I’m demented They sent me to the real world And kept telling me that I’m normal As long as I followed instructions I did that but it didn’t work I followed them too literally I am difficult and annoying Just like her when she repeats the same shows Difference is I have the language to explain it Instructions Normal people apparently absorb them And it turns into autopilot I have to refresh my knowledge by asking everybody every time there is an occasion Explain the social rules to me from A to Z Mariam, you are thirty years old Correct Now start talking if you need me to show up

They got better socially Since they started this job I heard her say that and I tried to understand No, she wasn’t talking to me Around me Don’t talk around me I investigate Better according to whom? And what? You? How convenient Why are you the judge here? Why were they worse? I didn’t know them before the job This is all hypothetical Better socialized I guess Better brainwashed ONE OF US Therefore better I’ve never been one of you but I played the part

I can catch them Let’s just say disabled Drop the social correctness for a bit They look like me Not literally Behavior wise I saw that smile that doesn’t reach the eyes Kid, you need training Fake smile better I do it all the time I hear the comments about them The judgment The prosecution Why would you be comfortable saying it around me? They’re disabled, so what I’m disabled too Why am I hanging out with you again? I should have been hanging out with the disabled kids instead They never do that Questionable behavior Definitely But none of that Next

Am I not scared of making mistakes? I am My determination to find out overrides any embarrassment that comes with failure

Why’s she like this? Disabled Why? How? Since when? No one was telling me anything I went to investigate What did I find out? Genetics We’re all on some spectrum Mine happens to know how to use Twitter

What would you do if you had infinite money? London Wait, why? Shopping Okay? We can do that here It’s not the shopping It’s the people you’re avoiding

What did people do to you for you to have to spawn in London, Manchester, Bangkok, Europe on a Carousel. Don’t you want to explore new countries? Nope London Australia, yearly? Why? You’re going to Australia to meet people just to play some status game and then lose all the money so then home is abandoned so you have to repeat the trip yearly? I mean I’m staying in the UAE

I understand the need to avoid people I’m just stubborn enough to stay and make them avoid me instead If you have to leave the whole country because of one woman What on earth did that woman do? What did I do? Everything

I don’t look like money Nor act like money I don’t even know what that means I leave it in the bank where it belongs Scattered among different locations Eggs in one basket? No, not one point of failure Who taught me to invest? No one Vibes and audacity

Totally normal to come home and find yourself next to dead people. Are we in the same category? I guess.

Does any of your moms do that? Put her passport photo there Next to her dead father Perfect Next

If I just said it no one would believe me That’s why I attached the proof Exhibit #970 Things I see at home but never question I think they might actually like me I am still not sure But the photo is there Same category as my dad Checks out Next

Why is my nose giving Michael Jackson Guys I didn’t have any surgeries It’s photoshop Next

I explained the nose already I am not repeating myself It just spawned on my face and grew on me Checkmate Next

There were allegations Which is why I have to explain the obvious No, no Botox eyebrow lift No, I did not get my Roman nose from a doctor Stop asking Next It’s painfully obvious Why do I have to prove it?

If you were wondering That’s why I avoid gatherings My appearance was put under a microscope Guys It’s a lash lift Brow lamination Why do my eyebrows look well behaved? Beats me Release me Next

Why would I get botox? I will probably Just not yet I’m barely thirty What’s the rush? Release me I go out once and now there are rumors Mariam changed her face again Ridiculous Next

And that Ladies and gentlemen Is why Cinderella has to leave at midnight Because if she stays She gets a list of requirements Botox Filler Hair I ain’t doing none of that Oh look it’s almost twelve BYE

Why are they dusty? Because I left Books get dusty when I leave Next

You’d think I was studying English literature the way I generate literature in english Nope Language is secondary Understand first Interpret later Therefore I can read in either language And translate it to the other one

Take that Explain me She must not be good In Arabic I am I’m just vibing in English Release me Next I set the curve for the Arabic language department

I blame cartoons I wish everyone spoke Classical Arabic instead Your dialects are confusing me I’m speaking in a globalized arabic dialect now Where are you from? Here, why? Because you just used three dialects in one conversations Vibes Next I mirror people

Don’t ask me where I’m from I’m from wherever the situation needs me to be Okay bye Next

It’s a mess Two people Two dialects I emerge from the situation with a white one

Which side of the border am I from? Unfortunately for me and everyone involved Both Next

Blame my parents They produced a hybrid And refused to elaborate Which side gave me the nose? No idea Also both Hybrid Next

You picked one and ran off You were ashamed of your origins Release me I refused to pick Therefore I created a new dialect

Things to do in Dibba 1. Leave 2. Meet Mariam 3. Then leave

Release me What else is there to do? Mariam is here Therefore everyone stays No need for London No need for Australia Dibba is the place to be

Where’d you guys think I was from anyway? I’ve been telling you for months. I just forgot to mention the name of the place. Obviously naturally Mariam spawned in Dibba of all places. Ridiculous. Next.

Checks out The beaches The mountains And Mariam No better place to be in my opinion Everyone come to Dibba I probably won’t be here But you’ll see my handprints everywhere

Summers in Dibba Heavenly because the rich and bougie left The whole town belongs to me now You don’t know what you just unleashed

It must be a different Dibba than the one you guys know. Exactly my point. I never played by their rules. Next.

Stay when they travel and travel when they stay Sleep when they’re awake and wake up when they sleep Unleash chaos The town will follow my rules Did it work? Well, worked well enough I don’t care about the consequences

They follow scripts Even names follow a script Mariam Sultan Amna Fatima Shaikha Aisha Ahmed Guys, those are the same few names recycled Release me But I’ll take Mariam After that Release me Next

Ali Mohammed Abdulla Who else? Khawla Next Give me something new Mahra Good enough What’s happening to the new generation? You don’t want to know Abominations Those names are weird Who’s picking them? I’m probably going back to the menu

Every house needs a Mariam Otherwise how would it function? According to my dataset Mariam is the common denominator No more questions I’ve proved myself Mariam is the name My name Bond James Bond Just kidding Mariam Just Mariam

Let the consequences come I’m ready Ask anyone from Dibba if they know me They’ll probably say who the hell is that Sorry guys I was operating from under the radar For years Next

Tourism propaganda If you come to Dibba You might see me But probably not Because I don’t leave the house And if I do it’s not in my car Solve it Try all of the family’s cars One of them might have me in it

You saw my car? Exactly My car I wasn’t driving it It operates without me Call the driver Car checkup and petrol please Mariam is doing the princess treatment thing again

I’m perfectly capable of driving But why would I? Exactly Next

Royalty Treatment On grounds of Zero grounds I don’t know why I act like this I’m royalty Trust me Next

I can overturn managements My abilities stop at driving I don’t like driving It is a necessity Get me a carriage with horses Or just a horse Maybe a camel No, I won’t be horse riding Someone has to guide the animal

Meet family where they are Not where you are Someone has to travel Shouldn’t always be one of you

Car All of that drama over a car And I hate driving I burned the place down over some car keys Just to refuse to drive it

You’ve called the Police Correct You got they key back Correct So drive No

Would you have driven me around if I had no car? Would you have taken me to work and back? Would you have paid me the same amount that work pays me? Then what’s the problem? Give me my keys.

Calculate my income monthly Give me that amount monthly That’s my car’s rent fee It’s isn’t a limo It’s a Camry It’s expensive if you think of it this way

Why does everyone want my car? Beats me They keep trying to steal it What would you guys have done if it was a Mercedes? Thank god it’s a Toyota And it still gets stolen

What color? Brown Chocolate brown Where would you find it? Parked in the garage It rarely leaves the garage Saves money No petrol no tickets no nothing Wait around for someone to go out and hop in

No contradictions found My car I decide how often it gets used Which is minimum Go to work and drive back How do I live? Walkable community

Will I stop talking about Dibba? No There’s so much to say Sambraid is the spawn point Everything And I mean EVERYTHING Started there Now it’s a town Now it’s a city Now it’s a tourist attraction If anyone asks why Dibba? Tell them Mariam said so

None of this existed when I was an egg I mean Not born yet And yet It is now the Place The pearl spawn point I still can’t swim or dive But if you push me into deep waters and bolt Don’t be surprised if you find me on shore

Hilariously mundane The mythology says something Reality says Dibba For heaven’s sake Not again There aren’t many schools here A single google maps search will defeat me

I can feel my thighs touching and I don’t like it. How did I spend thirty years without knowing the feeling? Beats me. It’s a nightmare. A sensory nightmare. Next.

I declared War because I refused to leave this place. Yes, Dibba. I realize the dramatic implications and I refuse to tone it down. Next.

They had to kick me out. Otherwise I would probably start demanding a sovereign rule of the state and appoint myself as the ruler. Therefore, Sharjah. Next.

Ridiculous. What’s that territory that is called the Room. I’m translating roughly. It is a vibe. We used to pick up the phone and eavesdrop on someone 3 houses away. Next.

They’ll come after you The rulers I just have to point That guy He pissed me off So anyway Why didn’t I? No idea I like to take matters into my own hands first

Game of thrones? That is just Saturday in Dibba Checks out Next

Damn I smell good I mean my clothes Only way I can notice is if I leave it somewhere And return to it later I was walking around smelling like this? SUCCESS Next

Don’t be surprised I basically dumped perfume on my safety vest Before doing Dismissal Duty There was no need for that Drama Safety officer? No, we see you Mariam We smell you You’re the IT lady Goddamn it

How dare you tell everyone that we beat you up? No idea But I dare And I tell Next

These Events were occurring in Dibba the whole time? Yes Yes they were Next

Dibba Cinematic Universe What the hell Sure Next

Lying my ass off It’s called fiction Except it’s real Next

How do you guys think the bills took care of themselves? Me and mom. Next. Money plus tech. Next.

Where does genius spawn? Dibba. How convenient, Mariam. Next.

Why am I advertising the place? Supporting local tourism. Next.

It’s the best place in the world Disprove it I made sure of it Next

You knew I was crazy when you knocked on my door. In fact, that is precisely why did. You can’t leave like a thief in the night after that. Everyone knows now. Hilarious. Next.

I leave like a thief in the night. Because if I don’t, I won’t hear the end of it. Mariam, why? Leave tomorrow instead. Fine. Next.

My answer to the question of why I never got married is that I haven’t built an empire yet. And once I do I won’t even want to probably. Release me. Next.

This is our land. Everything under the sun is ours. Simba, you are the king of the land. I’ll take Scar’s role if you guys keep stealing my things. If not, then I’ll be the monkey. Next.

Decades of inheritance disputes. Watch Lion King. Not even Hamlet or whatever. Disney version. Explains my situation perfectly. Next.

That’s crazy? I know. No one in their right mind could make that connection. Good thing I’m not. Which one is our land? Damn, grandpa was doing numbers before real estate was even a thing. Keep it. I want my car. Next.

This is the land of our people Then why am I not free? Checkmate Am I not one of the people? Then? Next.

Seriously What am I supposed to do with palm trees Release me There ain’t even a pool anymore

I have the IQ level of an Einstein And the emotional maturity of a 5 year old Good luck Next

I just happened to be female Release me No, I’m not taking the prince Unless he’s loaded and leaves me be

Maybe twitter is not the place for science Research findings and proposals Is that going to stop me? Absolutely not I solved civilizations problems and packaged it in the form of tweets and I’m not apologizing Marie Curie could never

I think movie dates are overrated So stressful having someone watch you watch a movie, my siblings traumatized me in that regard ARE YOU WATCHING IT CORRECTLY? Jeez Next

Therefore I watch movies alone No, I will probably never change I’m obsessive and replay the same scene five times No one could tolerate that Next

That is ridiculous I’m not lying I force the actors to act over and over and over What did he say? Facial expressions, background This isn’t regular movie watching This is a movie critic kind of watching

Movie theaters defeat the purpose Why am I not in control? This is stressful The movie keeps going Whether I like it or not This is a hostage situation Yes, a movie could be watched over a week Because I’m watching it correctly Making sure I never have to rewatch it

Demented Same thing with books No I will probably never change Next

Why am I taking too long watching the movie or reading the book? Because I’m doing it correctly. Mariam, are you listening to what you just insinuated? Yes, I study books and movies the same way I study course material.

Yes No one enjoys a sore movie watcher This isn’t Cinema 101 Mariam Is that even a thing? Entertainment is work That’s why I can’t just Watch A Movie

Dangerous I’ll get inspired And try to do it in real life Commit completely Pull it off Complain that my life is just like fiction

I am depressed I am off to Manchester to feel better My aunt ladies and gentlemen Then she wonders why no one believes her Reasoning is off because there is no reasoning She’s going to Manchester because she decided to Anything that happens could be used as an excuse

Well Guys She’s lying because she can’t say I’m going because I want to You trained us to become story tellers

If you want me to lock in Pay me If you want me to watch a movie Pay me If you want me to read a book Pay me My intellect is expensive Here I am wasting it away in Dibba of all places

No wonder I was depressed Sharjah has more books I feel better there Next

I spawned in Sharjah sometimes House of Wisdom Book Fair Dibba was treating me poorly You guys might get me

Even my outings are ridiculously me Quit your job and go to the book fair Mariam, why? Books Next

Don’t ask me if I want anything from the book fair. If you know you know. I don’t do it lightly. Random niche interests. You’ll regret it. Next.

I thought he was giving me homework. He may as well have been the way I took it so seriously. Research mode activated. Why do I want these books? Don’t ask. Even I don’t know. I’ll find out after I read them. Next.

No one brainwashed me into being a reader I think it’s it’s genetic at this point There was nothing anyone could do Bound to happen Sooner or later The being a writer thing though That’s a surprise

If my mom was counting on us kids to tell her what the kids are up to, then she’s in for a surprise. We have no idea, we’re always up to something else entirely.

Can I just print out my twitter profile and publish it? But the music and the pictures. It’s not the same. This is an experience. The writing and the music and the lyrics and the quotes and the photographs are all connected. Could a book do that?

Murakami mentions songs. I post them. Checkmate. Next.

Something’s off if they came out of their mothers’ bellies normal and “gone crazy” after dealing with you. Pretend it has nothing to do with you all you want but we don’t live in a vacuum unfortunately. Actions have consequences. Naturally. Next.

I see reality and I act and react according to reality and reality says I’m the best so when I act like I’m the best they stop me for a second to say: are you sure you don’t want to go to the psych ward again?

Well If I was bipolar At least my mania delivers Cash Competence Business models

That’s just a woman being normal, guys. Why did you have to drive me crazy to fit in your mold? It’s a stupid mold, look at it. The year is 2026. Wake up.

I’m not the one who took Adam’s sons model and ran off trying to be Cain. What an inspiration. I too wish to kill my brother. I mean sister, whatever. Why am I Abel in this story? Because it’s convenient and I never tried to kill anybody. I died, therefore Abel. Me being female is just a footnote. I don’t know either, okay? Checks out. Next.

Actions take some time Consequences take a lifetime

I was leaving that information hidden for a reason. Leverage. I never wanted things to get so bad that I’d have to use it. Not my problem anymore. The Public Record.

I was moving like Little Finger in there the whole time. That’s not what women do. But it is what Mariam does. PS. That is exactly what women do, I just took it and applied it worldwide. Globally instead of locally. Next.

You guys are scared of everything I mean me too I’m just stupid enough to do it anyway Where’s my restraint? Died along with me

Imagine with me I left dibba with a backpack Looking like a nerd Locate the nearest book spawn location Found myself in Sharjah and stayed

You don’t even know me You know my mom’s version of me That’s another person There’s the sister version The friend, colleague, manager, classmate, stranger, professor, doctor Each one of them has a version

The public knew me through my family My family was talking mad shit about me

Am I traumatized enough to be allowed to be depressed and anxious now, or do I need to go to war? Locate one and send me. PTSD is much more easier to explain than CPTSD. They did that. Over three decades. I adapted and this is the result. Mariam.

I wasn’t allowed to have feelings or talk about them. Feelings are gay. Action. What’s crying going to do? Do that in private in your locked office like a big girl and come out after to destroy them. Is that how I did it? Yes. But I rarely cried. The stress of locating every single headcount in the school was driving me mad. I am only one person with a laptop and a phone, stop calling me every five seconds.

A laptop and a phone And my brain My body Mariam, a laptop and a phone in your hands are nuclear weapons of mass destruction

What am I mad about? Being harmed You’re distressed over being the harmer I cannot help you with that and I won’t

If you don’t like the way we do things Leave Okay, hear me out I don’t like the way you do things I will intervene and change and influence Then I will leave

The kids will read this. The older generation is gone. I escaped the mold to tell you guys it does not have to be that way and it does not have to be the other way. There is a third way and it is my way. Next.

‫ﻧرد اﻟﺣﻘوق ﻻﺻﺣﺎﺑﮭﺎ‬ ‫ﻣرات اﻟﺣﻘوق ﺗﻛون دروس ﺗﺄدﯾﺑﯾﺔ‬

So sensitive If you can’t take it Don’t dish it out Taste it first If it’s something you can handle Then dish it out I can take almost anything Which is why I’m dishing everything out

I took it I kept taking it They kept giving it to me There was an accumulation of dishes There was a feast The Last Supper Those were all the dishes you gave me Enjoy your meal

They wanted to cannibalize me probably I am not the dishes you gave me I am a woman Focus

I am sensitive That is the joke Five year old emotional maturity, remember? With no restraint And a brilliant mind

Sent me to my “crazy” aunt to deal with me What happened? Two crazy women squared

They feel guilty Or so I’m told What am I supposed to do with that? You may feel it Your guilt is not my problem

So you guys only claim your toys when you see someone else playing with them? That is toddler logic and you know it. It’s been there the whole time.

Ridiculous Clash of the titans interrupted By my sister asking why the hell I’m drinking her tea That is how households operate Checks out Next

I’m a real person I swear I’m just talking weird because it’s fun and I know too much to let it go to waste.

I talked about flying cars and talking trees before. Why is anyone surprised at this point? There is no limit to my imagination.

Living room. I am living in this one, go live in the other one. Is that why we have a lot of couches in our house? Checks out. Next.

At this point When I ask where something is And they say it’s in the living room And we have to specify which one It kind of defeats naming it Call it the Communal Area

I forget about the acts of terrorism I call tweeting That’s why they’re scared Mariam Look at your writing Ridiculous Next

Didn’t write anything about Dubai yet So here we go I broke my elbow in kite beach Driving a scooter I had no business getting on Wait, that sounds like anti-advertisement It wasn’t the beach’s fault It was the scooter Me? Oh, and the sun No, there weren’t any witnesses

Don’t laugh How does George wake me up? By attacking me every couple hours ………… There is no other room We’re stuck together Forever Next

Oh no Was I brainwashing the kids? Or teaching them how to think? Who the hell Thought it was a good idea To place MARIAM In a school setting?

I’ve only had female students for one year They were insane Third graders? Hazard Fifth graders? Hazard Seventh graders? Food in the lab Well, if it helps you solve the tests, I’ll allow it Ninth graders? Dead silence No one was even breathing And they took way too long to finish Way way way too long Perfectionists It was scary The grades were up top But the environment was creepy Military level discipline

I don’t know what spaces are and why they’re problematic Why would anyone do that Speak For all to hear You guys are wild

No I don’t know circles either Main is my spaces and circles Everyone is free to read me

Everybody talks about Mariam But does anybody talk to her?

My perspective is of the utmost importance No, I’m kidding But if you want to speak You start with a shout

Classified information When online learning started The kids were using teams the way you guys use Discord

Why were they so lax with that? Beats me They were playing games, people This isn’t in the script anywhere We introduced restrictions eventually But it was chaos for a while there at the beginning

Yes I could read all of their public chats They were wild Next

Don’t give me online learning I play with my cubes in my online “meetings”

I was online watching students Who authorized this? Okay, let’s see There was no plan Actually they gave me one I checked on the family’s kids first

You authorized this, Mariam You’re the Teams lady I am not I created it It is not mine

The math department used to call me on teams Video call What now? She’s scary Military Commander

I’m not used to this Being told no What do you mean no? I’ll alter the situation until you say yes And then I’ll say no

I will contact Elon and sell him my account Wait, he already has it Does he even know what he’s missing?

I don’t have the patience required to stalk I don’t care I don’t need to know Release me

Status Marriage was supposed to give me status In the women’s community I don’t want it Next

Yes, I noticed How I became important Every time a poor groom knocked on the door I lived for that shit The center of attention Only to end up saying no

A man proposes and suddenly everyone is nice to me. Absolutely not. I will milk the attention for as much and as long as I can before saying no. No poor grooms were harmed, financially. Emotionally? No idea. Maybe. Next.

They made fun of me They knew I wasn’t serious Sitting in gatherings after the fact What’s the occasion? Another groom

I mean At least I got attention And chocolate And perfume Score I was robbing them blind

That was just the beginning I was supposed to be incentivized by the attention And bewitched by the groom What was I doing? Drawing An escape plan

I was taking advantage of them. Wasted their time. Wasted everybody’s time, because I wanted to be the center of attention for a few days. Hearts were broken. I said no. I stole the chocolate and ran off.

You gave me homework Go compare yourself to them Done What was the objective? I found nothing interesting

Always the religious ones Correction The outwardly religious ones That do the most unreligious activities

How do I know? Firsthand experience They did everything And I mean everything Then retreated to judge me From their high tower

I am a machine This is automated By me Manually

Don’t compare Mariam to anyone ever again It is illegal Next

The room where it happens I was acting like Hamilton Whole time it was DIBBA The room where it happens is apparently Dibba

That’s where civilization started As far as I’m concerned There was a war Because of course there would be I know nothing about it But I know there is now a border I refuse to investigate further

New page Every couple of months A new page Or else how would I cope? Family is family And this is a new page Delete everything from before

We don’t have the same mom even though we do. Try to make sense of that.

I hate driving For my nephew I would I don’t understand it any more than you do

I’m not scared of losing money In fact, I lost tons of money with my nonsense I earn it back I am the money

They gave me a bank account and guardianship over my siblings before my front lobe even developed. Of course I messed up. Next.

I stayed for them. To protect them. No one protected me. I left when they weren’t under my guardianship anymore. No rules were broken. No money was stolen. Just a lot of nonsense. Next.

Yes, the plot thickens the further back into family history you go. I’m telling my portion of the story. I can’t know everything obviously. Also I’m biased. For myself. Naturally. Next.

Why would I come on here and write myself as the villain? I am the protagonist. Also, I told you every evil thing I did and you laughed anyway. So I guess it is not that evil. Next.

What do I do With all the words Written for me What happens when poets become muses? Well Poet/muse hybrid Closed system of never-ending poetry

I don’t check if something is cool before posting or saying it That’s why I have an unc status

Before you judge me Ask them why they thought it was appropriate To ask me to marry them when my father just died

I lost count Unimportant Point is there were too many when I wanted none

It was disrespectful He just died Give me another five years

Oh They were rescuers Ridiculous Rescue yourselves From me Next

I overlooked all of their faults Covered up their crimes Polished up their names Only to be dragged through the mud

I don’t know what the kids are doing I know what I’m doing and I’m dragging them along with me so whatever I’m doing is what’s in right now

If you’re good at lying try story-telling. It’s a loophole. I don’t like lying because it gives me stomachache, but I love storytelling.

‫ﻛﺑﯾرھم اﻟذي ﻋﻠﻣﮭم اﻟﺳﺣر‬ ‫أو ﺑﻣﻌﻧﻰ آﺧر‬ ‫ﻣرﯾم‬

Don’t tell mom I came on twitter and pressured people into writing. I didn’t do it. Casualties are ongoing. Next.

I didn’t burn the bridges I blew them up I have a helicopter Next

I make it worthwhile When I show up I’m making things better

Does anyone remember Longlegs Or am I the only one who was hyperventilating I should have said no What on earth is this movie? I almost had a heart attack

I have no idea if I’m being stalked But just in case I’m making it as entertaining as possible Are you guys bored?

Technically I’ve never graduated into a woman The way you guys only pay attention when a man is around, who’s she? Mariam Yes, who owns her? Who does she belong to? That’s what it felt like Bidding

Downton Abbey I tried to watch it but I couldn’t get through it Anyway, it looks like it’s rich families visiting each other and gossiping, is this story about us?

You know the trope When you visit the neighbors Fall ill And stay for a fortnight Jane Austen and such Yes, also that literally

Don’t like the management in your house Go to your aunt’s place This is worse Why is the town’s source of gossip here? Great Next

That’s retarded I know Exactly why I love it Why put your lipstick inside your bag If you can get a pendant that is also a bag?

I doxxed myself on purpose Now I’ll operate with that assumption You know me You know who I am

Took me almost 30 years to get this Smart Ridiculous, I’ve posted every single thought

Huge body of words That was my life’s work It just happened to be compressed And tweeted

Name Face Place Contacts I think I’ve checked them all

I told them he was ugly Stop showing me his pictures And stop talking about him I didn’t agree to be his obsession

Deadass Mariam would reject a groom On grounds of he doesn’t look good enough Checks out Next

If I don’t lower my expectations I’ll die alone Or so I’m told I’m not alone

You created the problem You created the system Rigged it in your favors I wasn’t even planning on playing the game

Apparently Fiction is not supposed to be relatable to the dot And yet

A couple words On twitter Ruins some people’s days Don’t come on here if you ever wronged me Apparently I will broadcast any inconvenience

So this is journaling Why am I sharing it? Collective Consciousness

You’re gorgeous But if only you….. That’s my mark You had me with but First sentence is the truth No buts Next

God save you all The day I found out I was Beautiful Yes, there was a day I was walking around unknowingly Until people kept pointing it out

Funny story My siblings had twitter accounts I was intrigued Let’s see what this is about I don’t think I’m doing it right I am not popular on here Checks out Next

I did everything wrong I did high school wrong I did university wrong I did the workplace wrong I mean socially I was lacking But I was doing Numbers

Emotion amplifier My writing’s been emotionless Where are they? Off on a field trip They’ll come back Eventually

These aren’t confessions Don’t call the police Again I don’t remember everything I said But I’m sure it’s questionable How to manipulate the timeline Go to the For You page Repost some stuff That’s it Next

Why would I need an IQ of disrespectful measures I actually don’t know my IQ I don’t trust those tests It’s a test that tests itself Anyway Why would I need that if I was going to be a woman in dibba? Checkmate

This is public This is my unhinged persona And it’s out here for all to see That’s not concerning at all My teenage self could never

My public persona is maybe ten percent of this. Sometimes zero. Okay bye. Next.

Twitter wasn’t created for writing autobiographies but once I started writing, an Autobiography emerged. Next.

Autopilot Cover them up when they’re sleeping I did that on autopilot Even when I wasn’t sleeping Sleep deprived Insomniac Sick

Stop showing off We know you’re smart You’re making yourself a target I know I just can’t help myself

My family is a PR disaster Who’s handling this? Where are the headquarters of publicity? Nowhere to be found Running on vibes and audacity

You’d think it was a mansion The banished The kicked out You waited for me to come home to tell me to leave I was out already Could have saved time by not going at all

Don’t reinvent the wheel Use my notes I mean tweets Jokes aside I hid everything in there The theories The findings The Thesis

So that’s why they kept losing their mind I lost it too but I found it Did I lose it actually? Not really I never lost it It just looks that way because it’s more mind Than you guys are accustomed to

Yay Go Unleash your terror In another city Sharjah ain’t been the same ever since And it never will be again Mariam passed by

Nothing changed I brought my Dictatorship with me And deployed it on twitter Same mechanism Same principles We cannot do social media normally apparently

You ain’t special because you located a pearl The pearl is special Wait, what am I saying? Any pearl diver could locate a pearl Finders keepers Except sometimes finders leavers

I forgot Diplomacy for a second Dictatorship takes over sometimes The first one is the cover Look and act like a diplomat Actually be a dictator

For what it’s worth I’ve been strange enough to be asked What are you? What am I? Mariam

It’s more merciful when I’m away for long Because once I feel like home I have to leave again Dramatic

I think the pills were keeping me normal Now I’m exactly the way I was born Which is a hundred times worse For all of you, Rosemary

What are other people’s sisters doing No idea Definitely not writing a saga on twitter Therefore better then me

Wait I spent thirty years as an outsider And I had that much to say If you guys included me before This could have been avoided

Next I’ll add rules to who can follow me Above average IQ That’s about it

Yes Everyone was free to drive No interrogations Go whenever Come back whenever Except Mariam We need to know where she is at all times Make sure she can’t breathe Make sure home is not preferable to work I avoided both Surveillance only on me

Checks out Royalty Where is the queen? Queens don’t drive Lock her up at home

I’m starting to forget I had a plan Something about my Birthday It’s getting closer and closer January Sixth

Of course I remember I told everyone I rule over the cloud And to upload books online To collect a large enough archive To start civilization from scratch If need be How could I forget?

I’m not as strict as I pretend to be Younger students did not take me seriously Up to a point then they start being respectful But the General would totally lose control over grade 2 hallway

My emotions are back Good luck They’re ruthless I read some sweet words

Pokemon GO to work Pokemon go home Pokemon find a third location Pokemon not welcome there Pokemon die

Accumulate houses and mansions and riches When push comes to shove We have no place to turn to Not welcome anywhere What did I do? Exist I exist and it is an International issue VIP lost VIP found VIP locked in psych-ward

Mariam It is 7 in the morning Sunday Exactly Good morning

Found it I’ll call us The Eccentric One male three females Inventory full Requirement: being single I’m talking about my unmarried siblings Livestock No, sorry, just kidding I am one of them

They have an excuse Not old enough Me? I’m too old Next

Sticks and stones They broke my bones My words therefore will hurt you

Treasure hunt I have the treasure I am the treasure I posted it here for everyone to see The money maker

Anyone Am I the only one who understands me? I explained it For long

When you read fiction You might sympathize with the protagonist That is me Do it with me

That’s a scary body of work Terrifying Writer must be a menace Did you know they call me stupid?

I showed up Last person you thought to invite probably Why did I show up? Because you asked me to

Fifteen year old me probably knew we were a genius but lacked the confidence to demonstrate it. Once I got that, I forgot that I was a genius. I remember now.

I could have been any other way False There is one way There is the Mariam way That is the only way

How I be moving Damn, divorced Damn, has a daughter Damn, rich Damn, handsome Damn, why is everyone being weird? I am not interested in any of them Release me Next

I was manipulating time Time dilation Not really I’m using my time Time is time But time with Mariam is money Checkmate Next

Man of the house Sure, what the hell That’s what it felt like Getting up to go to work No one else was in the house So I played the part

Real conversation Do you have a screw gun? No, we don’t have a man in the house My sister: Mariam is a man And I did have a screw gun I wasn’t even there when this happened I’m paraphrasing

Yeah Mariam is a man indeed Classic Why did no one else see it?

If you wanted a damsel in distress Too bad It’s a Matriarchy now And it is self-sufficient

Damsel in distress And then what? Married off Life over Shit

If I get married they won’t let me be the man of the house because I’m not a man. In my house I did it anyway because I wrote the rules. Easy. Next.

Sunday It is Sunday Let’s operate the sun It is out And it is a day

The autism is staring at me from here. No one would diagnose us. ADHD? No, you’re looking for pills. Well, maybe, but also, can someone tell me what’s wrong with me?

My memory works like this. I left the house and walked to get in the car and saw a cat and a notification on my phone. That’s what I’ll think about every time I get that notification again. Next.

I could have gotten married at 21 This all would have been avoided I had the chance to either say yes And my future is written down for me Or no, and I write it down I said no I wrote it down

My words spawn on your screens all over the country. Spam. Hello everyone. What am I? Mariam.

If anyone is even a little bit scared or intimidated by this writer. He’s just as frightened. Next.

Why do I even have a TV? I just noticed I mean I knew But it might as well have been a cement block

This is public Let others find me by phone number Click Sync contacts Click

Talk less, smile more Smile less, talk more I neither smile nor talk Unless I’m happy then I’m smiling and not talking at all

I started some fire I was sparking everyone and everything Look at the place now People are writing again

Good morning I wish I was home I’m not serious Why did you leave so soon? You knew this would happen

Elon on some nonsense again Let me write my saga in peace

Elon in his headquarters Sir, it’s Mariam again Seriously? Take away her tweeting permit at once

For what it’s worth I milked every second I could with him There is nothing to miss because we did it all There are memories Good memories with my father Unless I spilled the juice on his car seats again Then it’s not a very good memory It is now, Mariam, checkmate

The juice on the car seats thing is where it all started, I think. Rosemary, you do not want to see The Admiral angry again. Get a hold on your juice, and your life. Done. Next.

I think I started something Admin team Who told you to take me upstairs Now we’re in each other’s business

If someone explained marriage to me as acquiring another member and adding them to my family then I might have thought about it. Heists. They wanted to kidnap me. Hell no.

Oh, apparently that was feminism or something. I am equal or something. Get me a male brain as equal as mine, then we’ll shake hands. Next.

Feminism is inevitable if Mariam’s around. Radical. Radicalize the youth. Just kidding. Don’t cancel me. Next.

Take me to rehab I’m addicted To tweeting I invented it just now Tweet Addiction

I’m not kidding There is a limit To tweeting SCORE So inconvenient Not the first time nor the second

Mom I broke it I broke twitter 😭 😭 😭 😭 😭 😭

All I did was tell my story If my story makes you look bad Then it’s not my problem

I could have said I was a man Provided a picture From somewhere And it still would make more sense than the truth

Last time I tried to understand pregnancy Well, never again I understand nothing

All I know is give the pregnant woman everything she wants. That’s my universal approach. Works. Next.

The house is not a house without Mariam. For me.

Yes, continuing the dibba saga. I love that place. It’s home. Home. Spawn point. Mariam.

I am a traitor Passport says Sharjah Home says Fujairah Figure it out Beats me Next

I don’t think mom allowed this much tweet activity ………………. Does she know my account yet? There’s always a “yet”

Loud on here Only on here Anywhere else Not a sound Unless absolutely necessary

You people are going to kill me maybe If I say Can I go to dibba again? I miss it already

Get on twitter On twitter Not overtake it Now I’m twitter

Currency My face is a currency Not explaining it It just is Makes money Next

My students The girls and the boys That’s my crowd Gather them Ask them to solve this

I knew I was annoying I didn’t know I was THAT annoying Everyone knows me? SUCCESS Next

Social engineering The benefits Minus the hard work Next

Send the kids on a treasure hunt mission Those are adults With accounts Same thing Start

Imitators I wasn’t done Imitate this Banksy level type of shit

Did I sign up for this? Why is there a spam tweet war now? It’s Sunday people Release me Next

Notes app doesn’t judge me. It just notes. Mariam was here and she noted. Next.

Problematic tweeters. Who misplaced their kid? I’m retiring. He shall carry it. Next

Mythological mysterious town. Dibba. Mariam said so. Next.

I could not keep up guys Rematch Who’s mad at who and why? Here we go again No, this is normal at this point

Fight for our rights Our right to have a twitter account That’s where all troubles start

Yes The summers in dibba were majestic Once everyone else left Ocean is ours now Until they return

Checks out All I ever wanted Space Books Puzzles Me All of my stuff Here

Give me a genius here Make it a woman Name her Mariam Then do not elaborate Send this Baby Deliver it by hand just to be sure

Release me Real story was probably Birth Baby Boring Next

This is just the way I am Stop attacking me for not being a good soldier You have a son now, he is just the way he is Let us be

So you love the doll now that I took her away You said you didn’t and that you’d rather die

God forbid a woman has a thought Then why do I end up with all of them?

I’m saying it like it is The women are covering it up But I’m showing it Here is the Infrastructure of the household

Checks out Women having thoughts independently is forbidden Women having opinions is bad Women speaking up is bad Women is bad Next

I just reset the system Laying low for the night No more Content Mariam is dead

I think I can’t write anymore It’s gone Dead Let me say goodbye before I get worse at this Goodbye

End of an era I will miss this I might wake up tomorrow and start writing because I forgot The End

Think I might get disowned if I confessed my crimes to the elders. Poetry. In English. The horror. Mariam, why? This is embarrassing, seriously.

This is my writing and I’m proud of it No This is my writing And I would like To have nothing To do with it

What is this strange feeling? How long will this take? My body cannot handle a hug or an embrace suddenly. Bit by bit. You never had this so you had to take it away from my hands. Very mature.

I’m quitting literature Not that I ever started but oh, well Code-switch, woman, code-switch I will never pick up a pen and paper

Lady Whistledown type of nonsense. Hello, it is I, Mariam, and here it is. Twitter. It is on twitter. Next.

Before I give you back the ability to feel emotions again, remember that it swings both ways, explore rock bottom to get access to the entire spectrum of Emotions. Next.

I will never write again, starting tomorrow. For now, I am exploring the darker shades of emotions. Sadness, sweet sadness, just how I like it.

Curse was lifted The one that made me write Why am I still writing? Irrelevant The curse provided the Essence

It is a prank. Chill. Anyone who has my phone number saved and contacts synced, shall have access. Good luck finding me.

Public record. My face is in there too, fully visible. No mistake that it is me. Next.

I wonder how many pages the book has. There aren’t any here, these are posts. Let’s say we collect my writing and put it all together in a book. How many pages would we need to tear down? Zero preferably.

In my search for normalcy I’ve come along the extraordinary. I think I’m normal now, the thousands of words I wrote must have helped. Casualties: the Twitter population.

Month is still ongoing. Emirati Women’s Month. I haven’t forgotten. This twitter account is brought to you by an Emirati woman.

Does anyone want more proof. I have a passport around somewhere. It says and I quote: “None of your business.”

I don’t look like that in real life Filters and makeup and whatnot Somehow though, I look better Conventionally unattractive

It was brought to my attention that scrolling my profile cuts off at approximately 3 days. That means you guys get a head start on canon. The older content? Gone with the scroll.

Ego Death The “resets” were complete, annihilating ego deaths When I came back to, I only brought back what’s essential Ego dead, body and soul alive

Once my brother tried to give us military training His credentials, he just came back from military training It went terribly, we weren’t doing the walk correctly Lessons learned: zero

Be nice to me or else I’ll migrate again Globally this time Sharjah, your move now Next

Things don’t always go my way So I have to take matter into my own hands Unfortunately, that includes turning it to dark comedy material Presentation matters In the end, things go my way After a comically unnecessary long, long detour It didn’t have to be this way

Dibba to Sharjah The Migration This is dramatic Because I am dramatic Every hero’s journey starts somewhere Zero to hero

I don’t think dibba wants to claim me anyway Tough luck I told the whole world already Even Elon was notified about it Ridiculous indeed You don’t want me Your problem They do Next

Conveniently I know enough about access to claim I don’t have it Avoiding work tasks Most times it works Sometimes they give me access Which is a bad move from their side You know what I do with access Leverage Next

You guys know my last name now Did anything change? No, same person Different lens Next

Connect the dots You have them all All of the dots Families Where does Mariam stand? In the middle Next

In my defense I was too smart to sit around and do nothing And too bored I was also too bored An elaborate treasure hunt only to end in this A LinkedIn Profile

What was a genius like me supposed to do? I have a job It’s boring I have time A lot of time Enough time to buy Elon Give me the keys to the kingdom or else I’ll shut twitter down Just kidding Can I have a share at least? No? Fine, worth a shot

OOTD Purple Red/black hair and purple clothes Purple, red, black No one asked Exactly Next

This is anticlimactic Conan confessing Batman taking off his mask Mariam posting her LinkedIn profile

It has come to my attention Some of you may have seen me In some mythological wedding I definitely did not say hi Sorry about that Apologies for my rudeness It was a vibe SUCCESS Hello, World! I was the one in the navy blue Yes, the look was legendary Thanks for noticing Next

I am the sister The weird one The standoffish one The quiet one The pretty one (I added this) The smart one The stupid one The one you forgot to account for

No, I wasn’t on twitter back then I have no idea what it was even like I was fighting some other battle probably Did I win? Yes, as usual I didn’t stop to add commentary while it was happening, so this is a retroactive message I looked stunning but I was stunned Chemically stunned Growth stunted Mouth shut Hair cut Black short hair You know the one Wink Next

History was happening Her on twitter dot com The cursed day that I decided to create an account What happens if I do this? No idea World is changed Forever Catch up to me Walk my pace Then we’ll talk Face to face Titan to titan Not hiding behind fake names anymore Yours with love and vengeance, Mariam Abughazyain Next That is my name That was a letter addressed to the public Stop reading now

Not someone you want associated with you No, god forbid you know Mariam personally You know of her You hear stories Myths and legends This is the legend personally speaking Mariam herself What am I like in person? Childishly serious Next

I’ve caused enough chaos to receive a national warning letter. And yet, no one stopped to stop me. Let her talk. Let Mariam finish her piece. Your silence was appreciated. Much appreciated. No, seriously, it was exactly what I needed to let it all flow out into the screen. Next.

Every time I think I’m getting a task An intellectually stimulating task They snap shut Steal the puzzle from my hands Seriously? Back to twitter Next

I don’t think I’ve ever left anyone off the hook Maximum damage for minimum action The final blow What happens if I do this? Press send

It has come to to my attention Work is boring Boredom is my Kryptonite Therefore I make things harder On purpose So that it shall take longer Otherwise it’s me and a screen staring at each other

I may as well have been big brother Big brother is watching you And I’m disappointed You were doing so well Give them a tiny bit of trust They start their murder spree First stop Mariam Next

What happens if you put Mariam, an established notorious radical feminist by many accounts, in an administrative position in an all boys’ school? Chaos.

Release me I was cleaning the mess of the previous generation No one asked you to put me in a school Generation influenced Can’t take it back They know me The boys know me By face and name Hello boys Smile and wave You wrote the punchline yourselves

Victim playing You wish Vicim blaming is your domain You may now victim play I never claimed that role in the first place Suits you better

Anti-terrorism My acts were patriotic gentle parental acts Arrest me for it if you want The last joke is on you No one is laughing No one is left to laugh but me Mariam gets the last laugh As I always did Next

Central Intelligence Agencies got nothing on me Functionally and literally Nothing you can use against me Me on the other hand All the intelligence Functionally and literally Everything I can use against you Deployed

I know my reputation precedes me I’m targeted By people with the utmost questionable of morals She understands Mariam understands I do But there are limits You’ve exceeded your limits

Twitter is a playground You can express your opinions all you want When real life introduces the test On a silver platter FAILED Straight to murder No second thoughts No “maybe I should stop punching now” GIVE ME YOUR PHONE My phone’s contents are now public For the public to read Curtsy bow Curtain closed The End

Forget it Mariam It’s Chinatown My Chinatown So no

If you’re bigger than the ocean Don’t settle for a fish role A clown fish Hand me the controller I am the king of the seven seas’ sister Ursula Hi I know, I look better than you expected

Coworker asked if I have trouble typing Deadpan serious I think I can get away with a lot more I’m not employing my full capabilities here As in, my getting away with stuff abilities

Yes, I posted my ID number for all to see What about it? Next

Digital IDs are a thing Easy to abuse You handed the elderly a phone What did you think was going to happen? They’re illiterate Functionally All a thief has to do is press a button

Once they find out I’m not retarded I’m done for. I mean I am, but the wrong type. Dumb, founded. I can hear and talk. My bad.

Apologies I blacked out Then wrote a biography Then provided evidence Then refused to back off Oops

How long Did that operation Take exactly? I’m serious I don’t know All I remember is death Personified and singing Nothing to say Nothing to do Nothing

About three months That is hilariously short Considering the range of the mission Well done, Mariam Well done

The last joke is my name My full name I don’t have to explain it It’s in the name All of you with the same name Step forward Not many That is the point Exactly Next

Security breach By security Everything clear? Clear Next

Nothing bad happened Yet Nothing good happened either Equilibrium Doxxing is only bad if I was counting on secrecy I’m counting on visibility Maximum Next